One of the great American TV initiatives is public access—local, city-based programming that grants weirdoes the power of mass communication. Here, the real scum of American entertainment thrive. Because the channels and the people who run them are mandated by the government, they have some interesting rules. For one: They can’t turn down anyone who asks for a show. For another, they can’t censor anything as long as it isn’t illegal. These freedoms helped me, as an 11-year-old boy, become a star of public access television.
The show was called The Dan Metz Show. Imagine a combination of Jackass, The Tom Green Show andSaturday Night Live, but all filtered through the ill-formed brains of an 11-year-old boy and his best friend who was from a “bad family.” It was fucking glorious.